In my past, I have had several different types of relationships. I am joyful to say that I can look back on my high school relationship and remember it as one that was pure, God honoring and lots of fun.
Unfortunately, as the Israelites went through a 40 year period of wandering and disobedience in the wilderness, I too suffered through a few years in college of lots of disobedience and even more wandering. I was flirtatious, seductive, and manipulative.
Ugh. I really hate thinking about it.
I practiced the type of Kleenex (throw away) relationships and used my words and body to get what I wanted…even though I never knew what I really wanted.
Thank the Lord, God brought a very special man into my life my junior year of college. A man that was NOTHING of what I was looking for, but EVERYTHING God knew I needed. Matthew helped ground me and has taught me so much about God.
And the day we decided to get married, I made a promise. I would never flirt with any other man again.
It was a hard promise for me. Flirting just seemed to come second nature.
Through these five years I have stuck to my promise….until this week.
Lets just be honest, I don’t really view myself as young and sexy anymore. I am a pastors wife, a mom of 3, and never get out of my sweat pants. Who but my husband wants that?!?
Well, on this certain day, I was NOT in sweat pants. I was in a rather adorable dress and even had perfume on! I was rushing home and on my way out the door when I noticed someone walk up behind me.
I turned…and BAM. Mr. McDREAMY was standing right by my side. He was tall, buff, tan and smiling. He even smelled good.
And there I was, in college again. I morphed from soccer mommy to one hot mamma.
Mr. McDreamy commented on my outfit. I blushed and flicked my hair. We exchanged some flirtatious words and walked each other out. We joked and laughed. He smiled and ended with “see you tomorrow”
He hopped onto his Harley and drove into the pink sunrise…..as I stepped into my mini-van…. real life smacked me like a ton of bricks.
I AM A MARRIED WOMAN. I drive a mini-van with three car seats in it! And I just flirted with someone other than my husband!
Ugh. I felt sick.
On my short drive back home I knew I had a decision to make. Do I tell Matthew or not?
On one hand, it was not that big of deal. Its not like we exchanged numbers or made out. I dont even know his name!
On the other hand, I had flirted and broke my promise.
Adultery does not usually start with a make out session. It starts with a kind comment and a smile. It starts with giving someone a little extra attention and a short daydream.
During marital counseling Matthew and I made a promise to let the other know at even the faintest hint of unfaithfulness. I had already broken enough promises for the day, so I decided to keep that one!
I didnt wait, as soon as I got in the door, I told him.
He responded in love. We laughed about and joked about me riding into the sunset with Mr. McDREAMY with the 3 girls strapped to my back.
Now this potential threat is in the light and has no hold on me. My husband knows to keep me accountable and I guess all of you do as well.
Never be foolish enough to think you are above the temptation of adultery. Matthew and I had just gotten back from a 4 day getaway for our anniversary. We had grown so close those 4 days. The enemy does not want us to have a strong marriage or strong families. He desires to destroy us. Remember that.
Stay on guard. Set boundaries. Live in the light!
“But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. ”